Wednesday, April 24, 2013

bottles and cogs

Last Thursday I had a plan.

That plan included boogying out of work on the early side and hitting up everything USNWC had to offer.  To brighten up my day, I threw in a lunch stop at my new favorite place, The String Bean.  My day was looking pretty awesome.  The trails were great, I was flying around and feeling strong.  The worms weren't horrible - except on waystation... That, my friends, is their breeding grounds apparently.  The army of worms attacked mercilessly on BOTH laps.

Michael, why would you terrorize yourself by riding through curtains of worms twice?

They were F'n everywhere.  This guy held on after a thorough swiping of my entire body.
Very valid question, reputable internet reader.  Let me try to answer that for you with this:

Ok, that didn't work - you can't see the full name of my ride.  So, I named my ride "Courtesy flush, 2-ply, and STILL a floater."  Funny right?  No, it's not.  Let me break it down for you.

I lost a bottle.  A worn out, grimy looking bottle.  But it was my bottle.  And I'm cheap, and oddly sentimental (it was the bottle I got when I got the HiFi).  I noticed it was missing halfway through the toilet bowl when I stopped to take a beautiful picture.

It was like riding through a fairy tale
 Ok, so I threw on my Sherlock Holmes hat and went to de-deucing where my bottle could have jumped - see what I did there??  I was on the toilet bowl trail and I switched the correct deducing for de-deucing... like dropping a deuce... oh potty humor.  I figured it may have left me earlier on toilet bowl when things get rough and steep.  So back around I re-rode toilet bowl looking for my bottle: hence, Courtesy flush.

I didn't find it.  I thought I had seen it at some point in my ride... so let's backtrack a little.  Way station was a bit of a shit show, what with the worms attacking, so maybe in my haste I was picking dirty lines and with the extra bumps maybe it got waylaid there??  So, there is your answer as to why I would subject myself to those rotten little bastards twice.  Unfortunately that didn't pay off either.  

I headed back to the lot to get water - since I had none left in my jersey bottle and we all know what happened to my other bottle...  In the lot I saw Tom Tom who was headed out for a ride and promised to keep his eyes peeled for my crusty old bottle.  After rehydrating and replacing bottles I decided to continue my recon for my fallen soldier... and re-rode EVERYTHING I rode.  At first I was just heading back to goat hill to check the descents, but with nothing going there I decided to just ride everything over again.  Now you are catching on... that's where the 2-ply comes in!!

So, what about the floater??  Yes?  You in the back with your hand raised nicely... Correct, the "floater" represents my still missing bottle.  Excellent.  I'm glad you were all able to follow along.

So, if you read this and happen to ride USNWC and you see a shitty looking clear bottle with it's blue/black graphics smeared all to hell with a black top - that's MINE!!  GIVE IT HERE!!

Ok, the bell is about to ring, but I want to end class with this note.  I rode the One9 yesterday for the social (if by social you mean a quick pace with a select few stops) ride over at North Meck and I love love love love love it!!  The 20 on the back had me spinning around a lot, but I felt fantastic over roots and when the trail went in the upward trajectory.  I'm already itching to get an 18 on there, but I will hold off and explore other local trails first before I make any hasty changes.  After the first lap we chatted and then broke off into a "fast" group and a REAL "social" paced group.  

I decided to see what I could do and took off in the fast group.  With the spinniness I couldn't hold on, so I was stuck alone in the middle just enjoy the heck out of my ride.  When we finished I mentioned to Good Guy Greg that I was excited to check out my data as I had a feeling I would earn a PR just by riding SS out there.  

I did.

Ok, I've held you long enough.  I think I have a name for the One9... but I'm just about out of time for today.  I thank you for your patience, but we'll have to get into the naming of the bike tomorrow.  Have a great day and get out on the trails!!

No comments:

Post a Comment